New Years

new-year-resolutionsA new year, a new set of goals, a new group of purposes, a new assemblage of promises, a new fixed mark, a new clutch of objectives, a new cluster of motley assurance…a whole crap load of New Year’s Resolutions.

What are these I resolve to do? You may question.  Simply put.  I wish to give to my writing this year: the humor of Kafka, the darkness of A.A. Milne, the lightheartedness of Tolstoy, the steadfastness of Kerouac, the cleanliness of Victor Hugo, the shallowness of Virginia Woolf, the romance of Poe, and last but not least, the granola-ness of Faulkner.

Perhaps.

But seriously, just like so many folks out there, I too put pen to paper and made a few resolutions.  However, being older and wiser, and knowing that the diet and eat right and exercise and drop 50lbs by-a-mentally-agreed-upon-certain-day was just a lot of hooey, I got real this year with the resolutions.

1)    Try and drink at least 1(one) 8ounce glass of water a day. (I can drink 12 diet cokes in a day, but apparently, it’s not the same as water.)

2)    Try and brush my teeth the three suggested times a day (but settle for the once.  Because I guess it’s time to admit that mouthwash is not an alternative to brushing.)

3)    Take one multivitamin at least twice a week. (I mean, I want to take one every day, but I can’t take them without food and the second breakfast is over, I’m off and running and don’t remember until bedtime that I haven’t taken my vitamins and by then I’d have to get out of bed, go all the way back to the bathroom and get the vitamins, then I’d have to go all the way to the kitchen for something to drink, then I’d have to look at the dishes that need to be done and really, when you remember to do things once you are in bed, they aren’t going to be happening.)

4)    Eat one vegetable or fruit a day.  (On a good day, when I’m on top of the world, I’ve brushed my teeth two times, had two glasses of water, and had almost 2 1/2 whole servings of fruits and vegetables.  These shouldn’t be difficult things to work into a diet, but when your only vice is caffeine, you figure you can skip the fruits and veggies which are so difficult to cut up and so expensive to buy pre-cut.  A vicious cycle.)

5)    Exercise. ( At least one hour.)  [A week.]  {Did I mention this is my older and wiser resolution list?}

6)    Think positive thoughts; put positive “Yes I can!” thoughts out into the universe.  Unless I was just cut off on the freeway; then I can think ‘I hate you and not only can you not drive, but I bet your whole family doesn’t know the first think about driving either.  Otherwise I will try to put positive energy out there.  Unless they get my skinny latte drink wrong again. I mean how hard is a vanilla latte made with skim milk?  Apparently, it’s the antithesis of brain surgery in the ‘bucks’ world.  Just cuz I want something with skim milk doesn’t mean I want it with sugar free vanilla. That’s just a waste of perfectly good espresso, I mean, the skim milk already puts the whole drink in jeopardy.  Back to my original point, I will be positive.  Except for every other Tuesday, just because.  And just to be safe, if I’ve received a rejection note; not had enough sleep; can’t figure out what my purpose in life is; people don’t understand my sarcasm; or I’m out of diet coke, I don’t have to be positive.  But other than that, I’ll give it try.

7)    Be more open to art.  Every first Thursday the museums and art galleries here in Downtown Boise have free admission and artist shows.  I need to take advantage of that more often and stop complaining that there isn’t anything to do. Because there really isn’t anything to do, although most of the TV shows I watch are starting up again, so there’s that.

8)    Run a marathon.  Get in shape to run a marathon.  Or get in shape to run a half marathon.  That would be great.  If I could start running again and run a half marathon.  Or a 10k, start running again and run a 10k.  You know you gotta start somewhere, so I’ll start running and get in shape to run a 5k.  So as soon as I know it, I’ll get in shape and walk a 1k.  There it is. (How far is a 1k?)

9)    Cook at home more often.  Did you know that when you cook three meals a day at home, plus snacks, it causes a pile up of dishes?  And even if someone else helps with some of the dishes, and even if you try to make one-pot meals, there are always still dishes to do.  I hate doing dishes, if I ever had more money than sense, I would probably hire someone just to do the dishes.  I don’t mind any other form of housework there is, but dishes…I greatly abhor doing dishes.  And there has been neither sight nor sound of those little helper elves who come in the middle of the night and do disliked chores.  Nope, leave dishes in the sink overnight, wake up in the morning and find the dishes still in sink.  Still…gonna try to eat at home more often.

10) Write a new blog once a week.

Now, whether or not I can keep these resolutions, I am not sure.  But I figure number 10 is a decent enough goal to try and hitch my star to this year.

Here’s to hopping 2013 is a good one for all of us!

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One thought on “New Years

  1. AHA! You read my mind! How do you do that??? lol. well at least about the water, fruit and running. I have given up on making resolutions, I never stick to them. Maybe I can just make these things happen without attaching any resolution like attachments…. I hope you write a new blog every week this year – that’s a great resolution!! I love reading what you have to write my friend:-)

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